No More Mommyspeak

I had such a bad week last week. For various reasons I was in a fog and didn’t practice for six days. Friday I finally took class, and my appreciation for each pose was enormous, almost worth the stiffness. The risk of daily practice is getting into a making-myself-do-it mindset, where I’m at war with my discipline. I should quit more often! Not that I recommend sitting around eating cookies though.

Unfortunately I was a bundle of anger in Saturday’s class. It was a strength-building vinyasa class, where we held lots of warriors and triangles for 5-9 long breaths. Boring, imbalanced and painful. We did a long, physical and emotionally-challenging Hanumanasana (splits), and then without a transition took wobbly, vulnerable legs up to Forearm Stand freakout recipe for me. I took child’s poses as needed, stretched it out a few times, but couldn’t escape the worst part: Aerobic Mommyspeak. I have a pet peeve of pet peeves, whiny little grievances, but I really react (poorly) to instructors who travel two octaves per phrase, imploring you to “push push push GOOOOOOOD!!! Lift and hoooooooold it there and breaaaaaaaaaaaathe… YES!” without a pause to think. I know I should just breathe, and let it flow over me without reacting, but such theatrical drama is intended to trigger an emotional response, so of course I have one. Moods flavor a class as much as any theme, so the yippy stressball instructors can please stay at the gym. To date I have found one single pilates instructor that I like; they tend to use this language. No offense some people love the cheerleader pep-talks, but I don’t. I had to appreciate the muscles she gave me and get out of there.

Sunday was much better, a nice blend of poses and breathing. There are some new instructors at my local studio, I hope they are good. I made a note on my calendar, “everyone has something to teach you” but it is hard to listen some days…

One thought on “No More Mommyspeak”

  1. Here here! There are a couple teachers I’ve taken from (and try, from henceforth NOT to) that I swear sound like phone sex operators when they teach. You know what I’m talking about? Where everything gets really breathy and then they go way up or down in pitch at the end?

    The teacher really has an impact on the mood of the entire room and my practice soars with certain teachers and is just jam-packed with aggravation under others.

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